This is not a defense of infidelity. Nor is it an examination into the reasons men and women cheat. This is an honest assessment of why women, for the most part, are rarely caught when they do cheat.
1.Women are smarter than men.
This isn’t a patronizing statement to try and get the women on my side. The fact is when it comes to stepping out women just think about things that men don’t. Where a dude will call his boy after the fact to say “Yo, son, if anybody asks where I was last night, I was with you” a woman will have it planned out days in advance with an airtight alibi.
2. Men don’t want to know
Some of my peers mistake this for men being more “trusting” than women, a theory I don’t necessarily believe. I think it’s more a case of naivite than trust. Men are the hunters. It just doesn’t’ occur to us that our woman could possibly be cheating on us. So even if reason #1 doesn’t apply and your girl has a drunken, spontaneous fling with the DJ from the boat ride, it’s the last thing we want to comprehend. She was out with the girls and that’s all we need to know.
3. Men don’t want YOU to know
And when I say YOU, I mean the world. Even in the face of irrefutable evidence and a woman is somehow caught, a man is less likely to go public because of his pride and ego.
“When a man is unhappy he cries in the dark,” says Phonte. “When a woman is unhappy, she makes a concerted effort to ensure that EVERYBODY around her is miserable.”
4. Women have more to loose
Let’s face it: women are more forgiving than men. Men don’t even like the idea of their women sleeping with their friends BEFORE they’re together so God forbid they get stepped out on during the relationship. We’ll either leave or start cheating ourselves to justify it. Furthermore, if a woman steps out and becomes pregnant, far fewer men will stay with her and raise another man’s child, than the countless women who have remained in relationships with men after finding out they’ve gotten another woman pregnant. With consequences like this women typically take extra steps, precautions and are just more discerning overall with their sex partners.
5. The Average Man Doesn’t Want The Headache Of A Married Woman
“Granted, there are some guys who don’t give a f*ck, but generally speaking? Nah.” declares Kwame. “Why? because he has no control over that situation. It’s one thing if *I’m* cheating. I can say without a shadow of a doubt that no matter what, come hell or high water, no matter how much I think I *love* this girl…..I’m not leaving home. A guy will be on that good Ray Charles: “I’m not leaving my family.” And a man will do everything in his power to keep both lives separate.
Women on the other hand can be much more emotional and allow those emotions to cloud their judgment. If I’m f*cking a married woman, who’s to say that one day she won’t break down and decide to tell her husband everything? Or have a moment in church and she decides to “give her sins to the Lord” or some dumb sh*t?